Homepage Message: March 2009
On June 5, 2000, the “London Daily Express” carried an article entitled, “Can you learn to forgive?” It began by saying, “Bearing a grudge can hold you back and even damage your health.” Dr. Ken Hart was the first to offer a university class on forgiveness. It was designed to help people forgive their enemies and let go of grudges. The participants all had three things in common: they were angry, bitter and wanted revenge.
Most, if not all of us, experience times in life where we are pushed to our limit as to how much we can forgive or how often. I experienced that shortly after graduating from seminary. I found myself angry, bitter, unforgiving and wanting revenge. Instead of time healing the wounds they grew worse affecting every area of my life.
After sharing the experience with a trusted colleague I wanted to hear, “Bob, you have every right to feel this way, every reason to be angry and withhold forgiveness ...” But I didn’t. Instead I heard, “Bob, you need to forgive and bless this person.” This was the last thing I wanted to hear. But after much anguish, I forgave and blessed him through prayer. The result? A peace I never had for years and freedom from my own emotional prison.
Perhaps there is a person you need to forgive. Not to is to keep God at a distance and forfeit his peace. R.T. Kendall put it this way, “When you allow the spirit of total forgiveness to reign in your heart, peace will return; but when you dwell on resentment, the peace will leave.”
The message of the cross is God’s love and forgiveness of our sins when we receive him into our life. However, what we don’t hear as much is that the cross demands God’s children to exercise love and forgiveness to others.
“Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.” —I Peter 3:9
That is hard and often times painful, yet so necessary. There are three degrees of forgiveness as suggested in the book, “Total Forgiveness.”
1. Detached forgiveness:
Where there is a reduction in negative feelings toward the offender, but no reconciliation takes place.2. Limited forgiveness:
Where there is a reduction in negative feelings toward the offender and the relationship is partially restored, though there is a decrease in the emotional intensity of the relationship.3. Total forgiveness:
Where there is a total cessation of negative feelings toward the offender, and the relationship is fully restored.
Which one would you like God to use to forgive you? That’s what you and I also need to do; forgive with the goal of total reconciliation. If it is not possible to reconcile, total forgiveness is still necessary for your own well-being.
Begin with prayer telling God how you feel and your situation. Receive his forgiveness and make the decision to forgive each day anyone who hurts or offends you. You’ll be glad you did.
If you haven’t received God’s forgiveness of your sin, I encourage you learn more about it. Click on this link and see how you can find peace and life.